Tue, 30 Oct 2007 17:09:00
Shiny new gym
WANT.
I just got home from the old gym, where for the three millionth time I was stopped by the same damned front door security dork who sees me a minimum of twice a week for the last seven months, to be asked “Can I help you, sir?”
No. No you may not. I’m going to the same place I go ever frigging time you ask me. For the love of Christ, can’t you take a hint from the guy half your age and twice as helpful and learn the regulars - then leave us the hell alone?
Then I had to wait in line for the same four machines. Then I hurt my damn elbow again on the stupid Hydro-Fit, which was new when Nixon was in office. Then I saw the same damned “Parts on order, please be patient” sign for one of the machines that had a date of 8/28/07 on it...and a hand-scrawled notation by a member: “When?” The answer is the first of never.
I thought about all the issues I have with finding a lane to do laps in the pool. Also the racist old couple that fucking chats at me every moment that my earphones aren’t in place. I never posted about the racist old couple, did I? Yeah...great people, those two. I try to avoid them at all costs.
Anyway, on my way home, I stopped at the Gaylord Wellness Center, a brand new place they opened in North Haven. The gym part of it is run by Healthtrax.
Oh. My. God. It’s beautiful. It’s clean. There are like, 150 brand-new machines in the main room. They have a special area for bikes, treadmills and stair masters and each machine has a personal television. They have a special station just for stretching. I’m sorry...two of them. There are three pools. One heated therapy pool, one regular therapy pool and one 75 footer for laps. Each lane is roped off, and NO ONE CAN GET IN YOUR LANE. There’s a huge, monster hot tub with a hot waterfall. A steam room. A sauna. Three locker rooms with private showers. Classes in everything from strength training to core fitness (abs and lower back) to pilates to “spinning.” (Where did they get spinning out of “riding a stationary bike?” The fact that the wheel spins?) They give you a supervised trainer for a specially-designed circuit of machines and track your settings and progress for you for free. There’s a huge, massive, amazing free weights room. If you pay a little more, they have specialists that will run your entire workout. They have nutritionists on staff. My doctor works out of essentially the same room as the main training machines.
Oh and everyone there working out was either fat, somewhat fat or old as hell. It’s like the gym for non-beautiful people! It’s completely non-intimidating. It couldn’t be a nicer, more inviting place. It’s like someone went into my mind and built the perfect gym out of what I need before I knew I needed it. And the “Membership Specialist” didn’t really sell me. Not a hard sell, not even a soft sell. She suggested that I could stay in Wallingford forever if I was having success. When I said I needed to take the info home and discuss it with the Mrs., she didn’t try to get me to sign anything, she just said “Excellent! I hope you decide we’re the place for you.” I know, that in and of itself is a sales technique, but she was the least salesman-esque salesperson I have ever met. Exactly in keeping with the more laid-back-yet-serious-work vibe the place carries.
One tour around the place and I now hate Gaylord’s Wallingford facility. WANT.
Anybody got $804?
*UPDATE*
Next day...yeah, I’m a member. Month to month until I can gather the necessary funds to pay for a year (which gets me a free three months). Tomorrow is, hopefully, my last day at crapgym. :)
Posted by JimK at 05:09 PM on October 30, 2007
Permalink | Trackbacks (0) | Email to a friend |
Categories: Personal
Tags:
Technorati: Healthtrax
Comments:
#3 Posted by Buzzion 
on 10/30 at 10:08 PM -
Must be a giant carboard box on a skid with a removable top.
#4 Posted by Rann Aridorn on 10/30 at 10:13 PM -
Dude, you’re telling me that you have that super duper uber health insurance and you can’t wring a gym membership out of it? Or get them to lower your premiums by a near-equivalent amount over the fact that you’re working out like a motherfucker?
#5 Posted by JimK on 10/30 at 11:40 PM -
Rann, you make an excellent point. This is one of those slap-your-forehead, I-can’t-believe-they-don’t-do-this things.
I do NOt get any financial credit for this, no. As I see it, they could easily implement this program at any computerized keycard having gym. Once a month or so, as long as you sign up and agree to it, they send the insurance company your attendance records, and if you meet whatever minimum the company sets...bam. You get a discount. It could totally work.
Bastards.
#6 Posted by Drumwaster on 10/30 at 11:42 PM -
Maybe Michael Moore can pony up a kilobuck from the profits of his last movie.
Oh, wait…
#7 Posted by Joe R. 
on 10/31 at 12:34 AM -
Once a month or so, as long as you sign up and agree to it, they send the insurance company your attendance records, and if you meet whatever minimum the company sets...bam. You get a discount.
Problem is, you could show up, hit the tanning bed, sit in the hot tub, and go home.
#8 Posted by Buzzion on 10/31 at 01:24 AM -
Problem is, you could show up, hit the tanning bed, sit in the hot tub, and go home.
That’s pretty simple to guarrantee against. You just make sure the discount isn’t equal to or more than the gym membership. So you do receive a discount on your insurance with the gym membership, but the net sum is still like $100 more than if you just got the insurance. Its an incentive for those who want insurance and to go to the gym since they’re saving $700 on that but keeping people who aren’t serious about exercise from exploiting it just for the cheaper insurance since they would end up paying more overall.
#9 Posted by JimK on 10/31 at 02:47 AM -
Its an incentive for those who want insurance and to go to the gym since they’re saving $700 on that but keeping people who aren’t serious about exercise from exploiting it just for the cheaper insurance since they would end up paying more overall.
Exactly. Lazy bastards looking to exploit the system will A) be fairly few in the greater scheme of things and B) generally be too lazy to actually leave the house often enough to keep up appearances in order to save 50-75 bucks a month.
I think, anyway. Some people will of course go to some length just to save a fiver. :)
I think it’s one of those things - like Medicare refusing to pay for physicals - that is ingrained into the system but doesn’t make any sense to anyone involved. Everyone just says “Well that’s how it’s always been” so it stays that way. Meanwhile even a dunce like me can see that better overall health would lower costs across the board for the insurance companies.
#10 Posted by RobSmalls on 10/31 at 11:09 AM -
You’re a Nutmegger? I had no idea (not that I should have any idea).
#11 Posted by Drumwaster on 10/31 at 12:22 PM -
You’re a Nut
megger?
There. Fixed that for ya! ;-)
#12 Posted by fangbeer on 10/31 at 06:04 PM -
We’ve a Healthtrax membership in Bristol.
They Roxorz
My wife works for the school system in Burlington. They have a health care savings plan as part of the benefit package there and we pay our gym membership tax free out of that.
#13 Posted by gcanter on 11/01 at 05:16 AM -
Getting a personal trainer at the gym here was the best thing to happen to me. Really helped get me motivated to come more.
On an unrelated note, have you seen this?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=YEqZkglTVYE
RSS (Subscribe)
Tip jars (Donate today!)
um… Gaylord?