Wed, 19 Sep 2007 14:04:00
I am taking a side
I know. I’ve hemmed and hawed, ignored the issue and basically blogged on everything else I possibly could, but I know you are all waiting. It’s the pink elephant in the room. I will finally pick a side and join the ongoing fight…
Ninjas. Fuck pirates. Ninjas are the shit and will always whup pirate ass, and I don’t care that it’s Talk Like A Pirate Day. I pick today, the holiest of all pirate days, to declare my allegiance with the shadow warriors.
Born in shadow, die in shadow, slay all pirates and their progeny. By this code we live. Stick that up your bilge pump, you filthy, fish-smelling boylovers.
Posted by JimK at 02:04 PM on September 19, 2007
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Comments:
#2 Posted by meatpie 
on 09/19 at 05:07 PM -
I’d like to see a ninja level a village from a mile off-shore...ARRR!!!! And what’s with the black feety-pajamas? I remember when I had cool black feety-pajamas....when I was THREE!!! ARRR!!!!
PegLegPie
#3 Posted by spaceworlder on 09/19 at 05:52 PM -
Levelling a village from afar? Pedestrian.
Taking down an entire village from the shadows, armed with but a knife and smoke pellets? Two words: Bad. Ass.
#4 Posted by JimK on 09/19 at 07:10 PM -
Pussies bombard. Real killers feel the warm blood of their victims. :)
(actually I’m still half-down with pirates, but please DO NOT tell any ninjas you might meet. I want to live.)
#5 Posted by JimK on 09/19 at 07:17 PM -
I’m sorry, but Talk Like a Ninja Day just doesn’t have the same flavor to it.
That’s because aside from the Ask A Ninja guy, ninjas simply don’t talk. They just kill. :) Talk Like A Ninja Day would just be a bunch of people hiding behind smoke bombs, scaling low walls and stabbing each other from behind with ninjatos. Kind of like a typical office environment, only maybe with a little more smoke. Cubicle walls are great practice for that leap/climb-in-one-motion thing that only ninjas and Jackie Chan can do.
#6 Posted by meatpie on 09/19 at 10:11 PM -
all this talk about killing and blood and smoke and shit...let’s get down to the real boon of pirates over ninjas. DRINKING. When a pirate parties, he shares his rum, his smoke, his women, AND, if you’re a member of his crew, he shares the loot too. Ninjas just sit around sipping rice wine out of tiny bowls and picking the tabi lint from in between their toes...w00t…
#7 Posted by JimK on 09/19 at 10:36 PM -
Thing is, a ninja can sneak in, steal your booty, have at your woman, drink your rum and get out before you ever know he’s there.
Of course, ninja chicks look just like ninja dudes what with the loose black clothes and the faces covered up. The same cannot be said for pirate wenches. (SO freaking totally not safe for work)
#8 Posted by meatpie on 09/19 at 10:45 PM -
Ahhh....The Slutty Pirate Hooker. How I miss the high seas…
#9 Posted by Christian on 09/19 at 10:48 PM -
no no no
I’m not down with the Ninja’s for 3 reasons:
1. Being a Ninja is hard work. All that training, and being all stealthy and shit is just to hard for this tub o’ lard. Pirates? No training, and usually ya gotta whip them to get them to work.
2. Ninja’s don’t exist. Nope. Never did. Pirates, on the other hand, well documented to have been around for ever. So Pirates, Real. Ninja’s, like Unicorns.
3. Babes. Name me one babe a ninja has ever gotten? HMMM? Can’t can ya. Thats cause ninja’s kill everything!! No time for loven!!! Pirates, on the other hand, are babe magnets. Just look at Capt. Jack. He gets more tail than a public toilet.
Pirates!! HOOOOOOO
#10 Posted by Drumwaster on 09/19 at 11:03 PM -
Ninja’s, like Unicorns.
Just because you’ve never seen one doesn’t mean they don’t exist.
Some things have to be believed to be seen.
#11 Posted by Buzzion on 09/19 at 11:16 PM -
The Pirates of the Caribbean attraction at disneyworld used to have the pirates chasing after the women. This was deemed sexist or inappropriate or some such and they no longer do. Now they are chasing other pirates. And its probably more historically accurate that way too. I’ll go with the ninjas thank you.
#12 Posted by Christian on 09/19 at 11:32 PM -
Just because you’ve never seen one doesn’t mean they don’t exist.
Some things have to be believed to be seen.
Ya ya ya...but until a Uni or a Ninja fossil is found, they don’t exit. And I ain’t clappen to make sure the ninja lives, either.
This has been changed back, and now includes Capt. Jack, and Barbosa.The Pirates of the Caribbean attraction at disneyworld used to have the pirates chasing after the women. This was deemed sexist or inappropriate or some such and they no longer do.
And it still proves they get more than Ninja’s!
#13 Posted by JimK on 09/20 at 12:38 AM -
Re: the hot ninjas...like I said, it’s hard to tell, but if you can manage to get that gi off...(NSFW)
on 09/20 at 02:47 AM - #15 Posted by meatpie on 09/20 at 10:38 AM -
Re: the hot ninjas...like I said, it’s hard to tell, but if you can manage to get that gi off...(NSFW)
The bald snatch is so they don’t go VRICHVRICHVRICH as they are sneaking along the wall…
#16 Posted by Ryley R. Hayes on 09/20 at 06:07 PM -
Both sides are fucktarded. You all suck equally in the eyes of… The Lumberjacks!
(yes thats me)
#18 Posted by Ryley R. Hayes on 09/21 at 01:05 AM -
The one fortunate thing about dial up is that I can’t see youtube videos. So what ever that is, it’s on dead ears.
I really need to move somewhere I can get high speed…
#19 Posted by JimK on 09/21 at 03:43 PM -
It’s the lumberjack song from Monty Python...and now my joke is ruined! RUINED! Damn anywhere without high speed! :)
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I’m sorry, but Talk Like a Ninja Day just doesn’t have the same flavor to it.
{...} ! *snickt!*