Wed, 02 May 2007 18:59:00
Britney Spears topless. For real. And it sucks.
Dudes...and dudettes if you get down like that; remember when we all wanted a piece of that? Yeah...that was a long time ago in celebri-years. Yoinks! After the jump, some decidedly non-hot, non-sexy (and actually non-nude, the bits are covered with flowers) topless shots of everyone’s favorite celebrity train wreck, the soon-to-be-ex Mrs. Britney Federline. These were apparently taken last month at a friend’s house. Some friend, huh?
What’s the opposite of an erection? Turtling, that’s what. My penis just turtled back inside my body to try to get as far away from Brits as possible. So not hot.
Also, she performed for 16 minutes on stage at the House of Blues in San Diego last night. For $125 a ticket. She was on stage for sixteen minutes. And she lip-synched the whole set. If I were in the crowd I might have put a hit out on her for that one. Or just fulfilled the contract that KFed probably has on her. Anyway, there’s video (grainy, blown-out cell phone video but video nonetheless).
Career. Dead.
Posted by JimK at 06:59 PM on May 02, 2007
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Comments:
#2 Posted by mgnmfrc1 
on 05/03 at 01:55 PM -
I would just like to say a big FUCK YOU to whomever made those stupid ass oversize sunglasses popular. Nothing makes a cute girl look like a complete retard faster than those damn glasses.
A-fucking-men! They look like a cross between Willy Wonka(Depp version) and a bug.
....and I’d still hit it.
With a stick maybe! I would too..
Anyway, come on JimK, this is purely a publicity stunt to get her-almost-gone back in the headlines with some sexual tension. How cheesy are these pics, the hat and glasses trying to hide her identity?
If this wasn’t a publicity stunt and she let a friend take topless pics of her with their assurance the would never be published then she is truly to stupid to breath and deserves to lose her kids forever and should be sterilized.
#3 Posted by Rann Aridorn on 05/04 at 07:16 AM -
They look like a cross between Willy Wonka(Depp version)
You know, that movie was fairly entertaining, but compared to the original it was crap. I kinda can’t wait for it to fade from the public consciousness (which it will) and for the original to keep being the accepted version of Wonka (which it will).
And yeah, stupid slut, career over, yadda yadda.
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#1 Posted by Grover
on 05/03 at 01:17 PM -
I would just like to say a big FUCK YOU to whomever made those stupid ass oversize sunglasses popular. Nothing makes a cute girl look like a complete retard faster than those damn glasses.
....and I’d still hit it. But I’m into moderately attractive, semi-curvy psychotic chicks that may put my pet rabbit in the microwave because I’m running 10 minutes late and she thinks I’m running around on her. But thats just me.