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I AM JOHN GALT.
Right Thoughts...not right wing, just right.

Friday, August 31, 2007

More Bioshock musings

First of all, Tim is brilliant with the gaming humor.  Between him and Penny Arcade, everyone else should just stop writing gaming comics.

I’ve been playing C&C3 in order to decompress from the Bioshock experience.  The story was so deep that I want to think about it before I play through again.  Now, either I’m so brilliant, or the writing and design were that good, because virtually all the elements, motivations and themes discussed in this interview with Ken Levine (warning, massive spoilers) were things I either wrote about already, or definitely thought while playing.

I suspect it’s the creators and not my genius.  Although, as you well know, I am a genius.  At something.  One day I might even find out what.

SPOILERS AHEAD!

Posted by JimK at 02:47 PM on August 31, 2007
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Thursday, August 23, 2007

Stuff.  And things.

- Would you like to see someone turn themselves from a normal person into a freak?  Someone who isn’t Jenna Jameson, that is?  Well, here you go (neither link is really safe for work).  By the way, I don’t call Jenna a freak because she had her massive jubblies reduced to pre-implant status.  I call her a freak for what she has done (through surgery) to her face and skin and body and just oh my God what a national tragedy she’s turned out to be.

- I haven’t been mentioning the whole diet/exercise issue lately because I’m just chugging along.  I’ve settled into a pound-to-two-pounds a week loss.  My workouts have increased in intensity and my back pain is much lower than it used to be.  There are days when my right elbow (arthritis) hurts a lot more than my back.

- Anyone want a box of Molto Tanzania Peaberry coffee pods?  I didn’t realize I bought two, and I will not suffer through another one.  I also have a full box of Baronet French Vanilla pods you can have if you’re interested.  I’ll mail them to you.  It’s either that or I throw them out.

- Bioshock has managed to piss me off but good.  SPOILERS AHEAD!

Posted by JimK at 03:45 PM on August 23, 2007
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Tuesday, August 21, 2007

A coupe of hours with Bioshock (for Xbox 360)

Random thoughts on Bioshock so far (with one spoiler):

Posted by JimK at 07:50 PM on August 21, 2007
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Friday, August 17, 2007

You may have noticed my absence…

...all three of you that read this blog.  It’s been a tough week around here, and on top of that I just didn’t feel like blogging anything.

In the larger sense you may have noticed my political content dwindling away.  I’m fed up, and how many times can I write the same thing?  I hate reading blogs that repeat the same political crap day in and day out.  Every story comes back to one of two boogey-men - Bush or Clinton.  Sometimes it’s Rove or Pelosi.  I’m so sick of it.  I have a limited amount of “political capital” to spend before I need to get silly or look at boobs.  These past few months it has been spent on Moore, health care and Cuba.  Not to mention the fact that worrying about a presidential race this early has driven me, and most other people who are getting tired of it, insane.

I realize that there are some people who are obsessed with being angry at every perceived injustice by the government, they other side, people on their side and so forth.  Some folks seem to have an infinite well of angst and bile from which to draw, and can turn any story into a political rant against whosoever it is they hate this month.  I don’t.  Besides, most of ‘em can’t think unless someone else tells them what opinion to have.  If the “uberbloggers” and political rags stopped publishing tomorrow, half the political bloggers on the intertubes wouldn’t know what sock to put on first without direction.  I’m fed up with it all.  Right, left, center, you can all fuck off until next summer.  I am out of caring, and the caring store is fresh out of refills.

I’d rather write 3000 bitterly sarcastic words about Bret Michaels than one more fucking blog post bemoaning the state of our Union.  Because it’s a hell of a lot more fucking fun. Of course, you just know I will be bemoaning the state of our Union again...because I can’t help it.  So everything I just wrote is total bullshit.

See, it’s my consistency that keeps you coming back.  I just know it.

On the diet/weight loss front: Holding even.  OK, truth is I re-gained almost a pound, which seems like it shouldn’t be measurable on a lump as big as me, but it’s reading the same every day, so...it must be there.  I’ve actually stayed under 1700 calories a day on average this week, so it’s not the food intake.  I’ve not been sleeping well at all due to a miscalculation in my BiPAP (a miscalculation I made), and this week it has caught up to me.  I have been noticing that I am more and more physically exhausted both before and after a workout.  This week it got to the point where I had to lighten up on what I was doing because I simply couldn’t move my arms.  I wasn’t in pain, I was just completely exhausted.  I’ve slept better the last couple of nights, and I will be going to the pool to try to do another quarter-mile this evening, so we’ll see if things have improved.  Although I gotta say, I’m feeling both exhausted and dizzy right now, so...yeah, that means caffeine.  Mmm...coffee.  Only not this coffee, about which I will write tomorrow.

So anyway, I will make a bigger effort on all fronts next week.  Let’s just call this a really shitty vacation.  One where I didn’t go anywhere and no relaxation was accomplished at all.  And I had to have my cell phone replaced again, as the front screen went dead.  Again.  Just like it did twice on the previous model I owned.  Is LG making these things out of gossamer?  What the fuck?

Oh!  You know what I did accomplish?  Shooting a -26 at Pebble Beach in three rounds.  In Tiger Woods PGA Tour ‘07, of course.  It’s not like I would actually walk a golf course and do that for real.  That would involve both going somewhere and the day star, plus his cousin Fresh Air.  We don’t do that here.  Fresh air and sun are for boy scouts and migrant farm workers.  We simulate.  I swear to God, I will volunteer for the Matrix when the Robot Day Of Atonement comes.  Anyway, that;s a pretty good score, I think.  You may begin worshiping me whenever it is convenient for you.

Lastly...BIOSHOCK!  Oh my GOD!  Has a game every promised such a deep (no pun intended) story with such creep-tacular elements and cool retro-steampunk action?  The answer, in case you are curious, is no.  The demo is so awesome I can hardly contain my enthusiasm.  I haven’t paid full price for any Xbox 360 game since Crackdown.  I ordered Bioshock with no care for the price.  It’s beautiful, fairly easy to control, has amazing amounts of creep factor, and to top it all off, seems to be telling a truly film-worthy story in a cinematic way that no other game to date has been able to pull off.  I’m really interested in playing not just to see what weird and wonderful powers the plasmids will give me, but also to know what happens next in the story.  I am really interested in this story.  It’s basically the story of a man, sick of governments of all kinds, who attempts to create a libertarian paradise under the sea, only his ego and domineering ways turn it into a combination of a morality-free science experiment-plus-social free-for-all and a dictatorship.  You, the player, come in as the last remnants of Rapture, the underwater city, are coming down around your ears and the citizens - what is left of them - have mutated into...something else.  Much of the story is told in the details strewn around the world, like protest signs, newspapers, film clips that play on screens, etc.  As someone who appreciates libertarian philosophy but believes that it must be limited or it will result in chaos, I’m looking forward to seeing where they take the story.  It seems to have been written to my specifications, with some gross-factor, a high amount of creeping me out and a decent backbone of reality.  Plus, did I mention it looks simply amazing?  I can’t believe that I ever thought Gears of War looked good.  Gears looks like a sixty-year old transvestite in a dirty chiffon skirt and a pair of torn leggings compared to Bioshock.

Recently Roger Ebert got into it with gamers, saying that video games couldn’t be art.  Well fuck you, Roger.  If no other game before it could truly own that label, Bioshock wears it deservedly.  As Tycho from Penny Arcade said

It is my intention to secure two copies of the game, entire - one Collectors’ edition, and one exclusively to shove up Roger Ebert’s ass. If Bioshock isn’t “art,” then art is the poorer for it.

Preach on, brother.

Posted by JimK at 03:27 PM on August 17, 2007
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Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Gollum is smoove

Most of the time these things suck, but this one is pretty masterfully edited.  Gollum and Smeagol sing Barry White:

Imagine the hours of editing that must have taken...all to amuse us for like, two and a half minutes.  :)

Speaking of LOTR, I’ve been playing LOTRII: BFME.  That’s Lord Of The Rings II: Battle For Middle Earth.  Pretty standard RTS game, which means I like it and will play it over and over while never really loving it.  I don’t know why but I play most RTS titles dozens of times...no matter how derivative they are.  LOTRII: BFME has some high points: the balrog for one.  Certainly worth the rental from Gamefly.

Posted by JimK at 07:02 PM on July 31, 2007
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Saturday, July 14, 2007

Absentee Bloglord, part “a lot”

I know.  I have been really lax with this site over the last few weeks.  I have excuses!  ;)

Posted by JimK at 04:27 PM on July 14, 2007
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Monday, July 02, 2007

Gears co-op, anyone?

Anyone want to help a brother out on killing RAAM?  I can’t even do it on casual.  It’s driving me INSANE.  The AI (Dom) is more hindrance than help.

Hit me up with your gamertag if you’re interested.

Posted by JimK at 08:58 PM on July 02, 2007
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Friday, June 29, 2007

Games stuff - Test Drive Unlimited and Dead Rising

Yuck.  Both of them.  Let me explain:

Posted by JimK at 06:37 PM on June 29, 2007
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Saturday, June 09, 2007

Crackdown orb tip - Shai Gen plaza - Corpse ladder

I was having the worst time trying to get the orb that is located at the top of the pillar, next to the lion statue, right in the middle of the Shai Gen plaza area.  I was playing co-op with juggalo1987 and I helped him get it by shot-putting him up there while he was inside a car.  Problem was, he’s not advanced enough to lift the car and shot-put me up there yet.

I already tried jumping off every building around the plaza and landing on it, but; One, most of the buildings aren’t close enough or high enough.  Two, it’s like threading a needle with gloves and a blindfold on.  Three, you die when you hit the ground, so you have to regenerate and get to a supply point and climb the buildings each and every time you try.

I also tried stacking cars, dumpsters, trucks, the big yellow skips, nothing gets you high enough.  Then I had an idea: shoot harpoon bolts at the wall and jump on them.  The problem there is, your character doesn’t seem to have collision detection with the bolts, and that means the game doesn’t know you’re trying to stand on them.  So what can you pin to things with the bolts, something with which you definitely have collision detection?  Dead people.

And thus was born Corpse Ladder.  Kill someone, throw them at the pillar then shoot their dead body with a bolt.

image
Click me, I get bigger

Hop from one to the other, grab your orb and go.  It also works at the lighthouse past Funland, and anywhere you can pin a dead body to a wall.

Posted by JimK at 09:41 PM on June 09, 2007
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Saturday, June 02, 2007

Crackdown render bug

This was odd...sorry about the quality, I was forced to take photos and video of the screen with my digital camera...Not sure how to screen cap the Xbox without trying to run the video through a capture card.


Can I just say that Crackdown is frigging awesome?  Oh, I’ve said that before?  Well it is.  FRIGGING AWESOME.  Also, I grabbed the Halo 3 beta and hated it, but then I knew I would.  Halo multiplayer attracts the worse kind of online players, annoying to play with and even worse to listen to.

Posted by JimK at 10:54 PM on June 02, 2007
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